Dear bloggy diary,
Today I woke up early, tempting to go to the swimming pool. And I did. I almost slapped my face and screamed at myself in the mirror that I had to go swimming. I need to work out because look at my tummy. It is almost dangling with circle of fat. I took no pills, no plastic surgery, no dietary supplements as I want to be healthy naturally by eating properly and working out often.
I was stupid enough to put on bikini inside and a strap flowery dress. I felt nothing in the flat but when stepping outside of the condo building, I went “Brrrr…..” and my teeth started dancing. The chill. The chill is circulating around and just then I noticed the sky was gloomy and foggy. Not more than a month, the weather will turn to be so cold and lah lah lah lah I can put on lovely winter clothes, for the sake of feeling pretty and comfy (not necessarily to keep warm).
D. talked to me and he so wished I could go the States in winter. I tempted to tell him, “Darling, if I go there this season, I think you will have to cuddle a big ice-cube wrapped around with wool” but I chose not to as it would hurt him if I ever said so. Next stop, the States in next April. Eyes looks straight ahead, I’m gonna make it. I’ve been missing him so much and so has he. This is his final year and we seldom talked since he was extremely packed with his study and exam schedules. I didn’t blame him at all, instead, love him more for trying so hard to complete his study. It’s been 3 years when he first arrived in the States. A thought popped in my mind constantly, which was “How are we gonna react when first seeing each other in the States?”. Visa has not been granted yet so the top priority for Spring time will be getting the visa and catch a flight to the States as planned earlier this year.
Back to my parents’ place last weekend. As usual, I spent 2 hours in the afternoon on talking with my mom about what were going on in my daily life. After a while, she asked if I want to move back in at the end of 2009. She said she wants me to come back as she misses all the daughter-to-mother talks and fights we used to have back home. I soften her urge by telling her that I still come back every Saturday or Sunday to enjoy her cooking, talk to her and help her take care of my nephew. But I guess it is enough. The more mature I am, the tighter is the mom-daughter bondage.
I confessed to her that the longer I stay on, the lazier I will become. I didn’t even touch my fingertip into any house chore. My life is just simply eat + sleep + work + funs. I became more irresponsible, more quiet and lazier to understand how other family members feel about me or general family affairs. Mom is not really worried about my life out there but more about missing me being at home. She doesn’t have a daughter to whine, to complain, to scold, to fight with and to share everyday any more and she has to bottle up and save it for the weekend, waiting for me to get back home and then starting to pour all over. Poor mom.
But I don’t think I will move back in or at least until the house next door is done with its re-construction. It’s way too noise with all the “booms” and “bangs” days and nights. I couldn’t sleep well and it will definitely drive me down at work. I may sound a bit selfish but this is the stage I must treat my career as top priority since I just started only more than 3 years ago. Honestly, I feel I am a bit ambitious. I want to have certain position (important ones, of course) in a well-known organisation before I reach 30. About 5 more years to go, not a long way but also not too short. A lot more to learn, many more challenges to take and a greater number of tough deals to make. That’s how exciting my life is and I just love every moment of it.
Okay, since career is my top priority, I must go to bed now. I’ll update more in the next entry.